Sometimes Fatal
by Huck23
Summary: *Future fic: Amy and Lauren are in their 30s* Lauren's infant daughter, Addie, dies. Amy attempts to help her [step] sister cope with the loss.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: **

**I decided to continue the original Misadventures of A &amp; L and turn it into its own little mini-fic. This story has nothing to do with the continuity of the Misadventures series. It's just a little side story where I will be exploring what would have happened if I decided to continue with Addie being dead. I also figure this will be good writing practice. **

***In the regular series Addie does not die.**

****Again, I am aware that Lauren as an intersex person can't have biological kids. This is just a continuation of a story set I started in June long before the Lauren being intersex was revealed. **

*****This mini-fic will not be long probably 2-3 chapters.  
**

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Faking It or any of the characters.

* * *

"It was a mistake Lauren, a mistake."

Amy was damn sure that that was the fiftieth time she had uttered that phrase to Lauren. And just like the first time Amy had said it, it had done nothing to calm Lauren down.

Lauren had left the baby home.

Lauren got up at 5 that morning. She dressed, shared breakfast with her husband Nick and then said goodbye to Nick at 7 when he left to open the Joint, a restaurant he and a college buddy owned in downtown Austin. By 8 a.m. Lauren was driving down the highway in her BMW heading toward the law firm she worked at. At 9 a.m. she was seated behind her desk going over business contracts.

When 10 a.m. rolled around Lauren flipped the fuck out.

Amy got the call at 10:15 when she had been in the middle of a session with her long time patient Julia, an anxious woman who didn't like change much. Amy felt kind of bad when she had to explain to the woman that she had to reschedule her session again…for the 5th time in 7 weeks. After that business was done, Amy hopped in her Mercedes and was soon racing down the highway.

Less than an half an hour later she was running through Lauren's front door and bolting up the steps of her two-story home while trying to console a frantic Lauren on the phone.

Amy could hear Lauren yelling and screaming incoherently in the background. The sound makes Amy nervous and sweaty because it's that frantic, panicked kind of yelling; a sad, hiding thing that only Lauren can pull off.

When Amy reaches the crib, Lauren is mostly quiet. The only sound Amy can make out is her deep, nearly hyperventilating, breathing.

"A mistake." Amy stated again softly, gently as she glanced over the crib bars.

Amy sighed with relief when she spotted the sleeping infant; she was almost smiling.

She looked down at the tiny baby sleeping in the cherry wood crib before her. The baby girl was dressed in a yellow onsie with a sprinkled donut in the center. Her eyes were closed; the child's long, black eye lashes contrasted strikingly against her cream colored skin and her plump pink lips were parted slightly. Her little hands were curled into fists at her sides and her tiny feet were stretched out so that the tiny pink circles that made up her toes faced upward. The mop of golden curls on her head fell across her cheeks like rays of sunshine on the warmest of summer days.

The baby lay quiet; she looked the perfect picture of peace.

A sweet sleepy baby.

But she wasn't and it didn't take long for Amy to notice that the baby's chest did not rise or fall. She was still.

So very, very still.

Amy tentatively placed a hand gently on the baby's back. "Addie…" she whispered quietly when she felt no movement. The realization set in even further when she realized how cold she was.

For a moment there was nothing but silence, Amy tuned everything out as she hovered over the very dead infant. She could already see Lauren's face when she told her, could see her crumple up at her desk as she broke down. All alone.

"Amy! Amy!" Lauren called over the phone frantically, her voice finally breaking through Amy's haze. "Fucking answer me, Amy!"

Amy could hear Lauren begin to breath heavily again. She heard the sounds of papers being shoved; of them fluttered around as they floated away from Lauren's desk and to the ground.

"AMY!" Lauren yelled.

Glass shattering. Amy could only imagine the sound being the framed pictures on Lauren's desk or the vase of flowers that Amy's brother-in-law Nick had brought in Lauren three days earlier.

"FUCKING ANSWER ME, AMY!"

Fist against a wooden desk. Amy was sure Lauren's hand was broken.

"Please…" Lauren begged, damn near sobbing.

"She's sleeping." Amy stated quietly. What the fuck else was she going to say? How the hell do you tell someone that their baby is dead? How? Amy sure as fuck didn't know that answer to that question was.

Amy was doing her best. At least that's what she told herself.

"What?"

"Addie." Amy breathed, letting the baby's nickname fall from her mouth slowly. "She's sleeping." Amy's hand was still pressed to the baby's cold, unmoving body. "She's sleeping."

"Sleeping?" Lauren questioned, relief coloring her tone. Her breathing was quickly coming back to normal.

Amy nodded to just herself as a tear rolled down her cheek. "Yeah, she's sleeping."

"Good. Can you pack her up and bring her to my office for me, please?"

Amy swallowed thickly. "Yeah, sure thing."

"Thanks. See you soon?"

"See ya."

As soon as Amy hears the call end she calls another number.

"Nick, the baby's dead." That's all Amy says, those four little words. No hi, no hey how's it going. That's it. Your baby's dead. Call it insensitive but that's what it was.

Nick didn't speak for a long time. Well, three minutes but to Amy it felt like forever.

"Does Lauren know?" He finally asked.

"No, I told her she was sleeping." Amy swallows again and then rubs away the wetness in her eyes. "I'm so, so sorry."

"Call 911, Amy." Amy could hear the sound of a car door slamming. "I'll be there soon."

Nick arrives shortly after the ambulance reaches the home that he and Lauren share. He's there when they wrap his daughter in a black sheet and carry her out of the house. The only words he says to Amy are: "Go to Lauren. Now."

Amy doesn't hesitate, she hops in her car and drives straight for the law firm where Lauren works. She runs in the building and straight to Lauren's office. She doesn't go in though. She stands in the doorway looking at her step-sister.

Lauren Cooper is a mess. Her white blouse and gray pencil skirt are terribly wrinkled and her eye liner is streaked black down her cheeks.

"Amy?" She asks when she spots her sister. She looks around Amy for a moment, noticing that she lacks the baby carrier and the baby bag. "Where's Addie?"

Amy flinches at the sound of the baby's name.

"Amy?" Lauren asks again.

"L-lauren…"

"Where's Addie? Where's my baby, Amy?"

Amy looks directly into Lauren's eyes. "I'm so, so sorry."

Lauren begins to sob. "No! NO!"

Amy shakes her head as tears begin to fall from her eyes again. "She's dead Lauren. The baby's dead."

Laruen collapses and Amy immediately runs to her, gathering her sister up in her arms in an attempt to console her.

Outside of the office, Lauren's coworkers are looking in confused.

* * *

"Sudden infant death syndrome or SIDS was identified as the cause of Madison's death."

Lauren and her husband Nick both flinch when the doctor says their daughter's name. It hasn't been spoken in the last two days.

The two are at Saint David South Austin Hospital. They are in a tiny meeting room, sitting in stiff, dark gray armchairs before a big oak desk. Talking to them with a file laid out before her is Dr. Rayford.

Dr. Nicole Rayford hates this part of her. She truly does but she elects to do it every time anyway.

"I want to stress that there is nothing either of you did or could have done. SIDS is something that just comes out of nowhere. No one expects it." Dr. Rayford states carefully, deliberately.

"I left her home." Lauren states bitterly. She doesn't make eye contact with anyone in the room.

"Tell me." Dr. Rayford begins. "How often did your daughter wake in the night?"

"Maybe 5 times or so." Nick answers, he knows Lauren is in no mood. He isn't really either. He hasn't slept, his black hair is unwashed and his beard is a thick patch of stubble. Even though he'd rather hole up with several six packs he knows that one of them has to feign being okay. Lauren, obviously, isn't up to the task.

"How many times did she wake before…before it happened?"

Both Lauren and Nick draw a blank, they can't remember.

Dr. Rayford doesn't wait for a response anyway. "Autopsy report says that Madison was dead for at least 9 hours. She died sometime at night. You were probably sleeping and you probably thought she was too."

Neither Lauren or Nick speak. Dr. Rayford sighs deeply.

"Look, I know at the moment I can't convince you that this is not your fault but really, really it isn't your fault. Sometimes this is what happens to babies. We put them to bed and they never wake up. I'm so, so sorry that this happened to you but it is not your fault."

Lauren and Nick still do not speak, they just let Dr. Rayford's words wash over them. When the doctor begins to read and explain the rest of the file they hardly hear her. Both drift off into another place, one where they are not here, where their baby is not dead.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: **

I don't really like this chapter but I have back to back exams and I'm trying to redo another story at the moment. So yeah maybe one day I will change this chapter I do not like but for now the show must go on…

*This has not been edited so sorry for that in advance.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Faking It or any of the characters.

* * *

"I never saw this coming."

"Me neither."

Amy and Lauren lay side by side on Lauren's king sized bed. Both were looking straight up, watching the wings of the ceiling fan above the bed spin and spin and spin.

"I haven't said her name in four months." Lauren stated quietly. "Do you notice that I barely say your name?"

"Yes." Amy didn't have to think about; her name hadn't left Lauren's mouth in a long time.

"Why did I do that? Why the hell did I give the kid your name?"

"It was only a middle name."

Lauren chuckled. It was a hollow sound, Amy barely thought of it as a laugh. "It was a middle name, a nickname. It became all of her."

"You didn't know." When Lauren doesn't respond, Amy repeats herself. "You didn't know." And then she says it as it truly is. "It wasn't your fault."

"I know." Lauren states bitterly.

"Madison." Amy states and Lauren tenses immediately.

Amy doesn't know why she's pushing Lauren now. She hasn't pushed since the baby's non-funeral several months ago. They dressed the baby in a nice gown and dropped her into a deep dark hole. Of course, it wasn't quite like that. However, the look on Lauren's face as they lowered the tiny casket into the grave said something different. Said she was throwing her baby away instead of putting her to rest.

"Don't."

Amy sits up and faces Nick who stands in the bedroom doorway.

"Nick." Amy says, more like pleads.

Nick's face is flushed pink and his eyes are brimming with tears.

"Nick." Amy repeats softly.

He doesn't say a word as he climbs into the bed to lay beside Lauren. Amy lays back down.

"How's the Joint?" Amy asks after a few seconds. She knows that there is no need in continuing the conversation as it was before. What would be the point? The two would only avoid.

"Good. We're starting a new line of soups, it going to be great." Nick replies. His body is now wrapped around Lauren's, his hand rubs her back gently.

Lauren scoffs and Amy flinches; the sound doesn't hold Lauren's usual bite. "If the new chef can pull his head out of his ass."

"Oh honey…"

* * *

"So how's Lauren doing?"

It's a simple question that Karma asks but still it's one that drives Amy up the wall. She knows, just knows that she been asked the same question at least 200 times in the last couple of months.

"Her baby died, how do you think she's doing?" Amy snaps. She doesn't really mean to be so harsh but at the same time she's so tired of being asked the same stupid question over and over again.

"I didn't mean t-."

Amy places a hand over her eyes and sighs deeply. "I know. I'm sorry, it's been a bit stressful lately."

In the background, Amy can hear Karma's 2-yeard old son William (affectionately called Lilamb by his mother) singing loudly while banging happily on what sounds like a toy xylophone. The little boy was a red-headed ball of energy who had his mother's good looks and his father's charm. Hearing the boy makes Amy wince. She was very glad she had decided against visiting Karma's house.

"I can imagine. I mean if I woke up one morning and my little Lilamb was…I'd…I hope Lauren finds some peace. Probably not any time soon but she deserves to have some kind of happiness after this."

"Me too. I have to go. A new patient's coming in a few and I should probably be prepared."

"Okay. Call me later?"

"Yeah." Amy tells the lie easily.

"Great." And Karma takes it even though she knows as well as Amy that there will be no phone call later.

Amy ends the call and shoves her cellphone in the case attached to her waist roughly. She sits at her desk quietly, listening.

It's noon. And Amy is waiting for the familiar click of Lauren's heels in the hall leading to her office. She's waiting to hear her step-sister's growl as she bursts through Amy's door.

She'd say something like. "It's noon, I'm hungry. Get your ass out here so we can get some lunch!"

Or Amy's personal favorite: "I know Shane's in town. He better not be invited."

But Amy knows that it's not coming and she was almost certain that she'd never hear the sound again. So when the door to her office slams open and she sees a red, furious looking Lauren standing in the threshold, she gasps.

"Lauren? Are you okay?" Amy asks worriedly. Lauren hadn't been to the office in months and rarely met Amy for lunch these days.

"No." Lauren stated blandly before walking into the office and plopping into the chair before Amy's desk. There's a small, hesitant smirk on her face. Like she's trying to keep it there.

Amy looks away from Lauren. At her desk, at the papers messily spread across her desk, at her hands. Just anywhere that isn't Lauren or the forced smirk on her face. "I guess I already knew that."

"Yeah you did. So let's not ask that question anymore, okay?"

Amy looks up then, there's a smile on Lauren's face. It's small but genuine. "Okay."

Lauren stands, smile growing. "Now how about some lunch?"

"Actually I kind of made plans with Shane for later." Amy grins when she notices Lauren's scowl. It looks hard and disgusted.

"Ditch his ass!"

"Yes ma'm."

As they left the office, Amy silently prayed that things were getting better and that her sister wasn't just burying her feelings. But Amy knew Lauren and Amy knew better.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N:**

The short conclusion to this crazy little mini-fic…

***Again this is just a little tangent. It's separate from the Misadventures Series.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Faking It or any of the characters.

* * *

"You're not okay, are you?"

Lauren and Amy sit outside of a tiny bistro. They've finished lunch and the only things on the metal table between them are empty glasses.

"The kid's dead," Lauren grounds out. "My marriage is falling apart, I'm probably going to be put on leave a.k.a fired, and the only person I really have to talk to is you. Since you're a psychiatrist I now look forward to at least fifty percent of what I say being psycho-analyzed. But, hey at least I'm used to that already."

"Laur-." Amy tries but is swiftly cut off.

"Also, I expected different from you."

Amy's brows knit in confusion, she can't believe what she's just heard. "You expected more from me?"

"You of all people shouldn't be asking that question. You know that I'm not okay."

"Lauren, I didn't mean to upset you." Amy says quietly. "I was just worried about you."

Lauren sighs. "I know. Look, I'm not okay right now. I won't be for a very long time. But, one day I will be. One day, Nick and I will be happy. Not the same as we were before but okay. It won't happen overnight."

"I know it won't but I was glad to see you today." Amy laughs. "It made my week."

"I knew it would. That's why I came, for you and for me. I'm trying, so try with me."

Amy smiles. "I will."

It's a small step but things may just be loo-

"Amy, Lauren!"

Amy and Lauren stare in horror as they watch Shane approach their table. When Shane reaches them, he smiles hugely.

"I saw you two from across the way and I thought I'd come see how everything was." Shane turns to Lauren with what she assumes is supposed to be a comforting smile and says, "Are you okay, Lauren."

"Shut up, Shane!"

"Get the fuck out of here!"

Amy and Lauren look at each other, both grinning gleefully. The stand and both place a hand on one of Shane's shoulders, much to the man's surprise. Lauren leans in close to him and says, "Checks all yours buddy." Before both women walk off.

"So you're not fine?"

"Oh for the love of Christ, Amy!"

Amy shrugs, grinning. "Just asking."

Lauren smacks her arm playfully. "Close your mouth, you're a better sister when it's closed."

"Hey, wait up for me!" They hear Shane shout.

Amy's face takes on a horrified expression. "He's followings us?!" She asks in disbelief

Lauren smirks. "Eh, that's no problem…race to the car?"

And the two were off, Shane running close behind, screaming their names.

_The End._


End file.
